All I'll Ever Need Read online

  Edward laughed. “Okay, guess I’m safe enough then if you’ve got my back.”

  Gary grinned but didn’t make any lewd follow-up remark. “Enjoy,” was all he said.

  The man at the end of the bar was drinking red wine and raised his glass as Edward approached, slowly winding his way through the milling crowd. He was momentarily stunned by just how good-looking the man appeared. Older than him, Edward guessed, late twenties maybe. He wore a T-shirt and jeans, both black, and sufficiently tight to show off his lean, muscular body to great advantage.

  “Hello.” The hottie smiled. “I’m Alex Martinez.”

  “Edward Conway.” They shook hands, and Edward liked the cool, firm grip. He took in the dark brown eyes framed by sooty lashes, the aquiline nose, full lower lip and the white, even teeth his smile revealed. He eyed the almost full glass in Edward’s hand.

  “I’d like to buy you a drink, but I see you have one.”

  “That’s okay,” Edward said, then surprised himself by adding, “I’m happy to just talk, if that’s all right with you.”

  “Very all right, although it’s tough to do in here with all the noise.” He took a sip of his wine and his dark eyes held a hint of humor as he gazed at Edward over the rim of his glass. “I liked the way you handled the tattooed gentleman on the dance floor.”

  Edward grimaced. “You saw that? I don’t usually get into confrontations so easily—especially within minutes of coming into a bar for the first time. Gary, the bartender, told me Herbie’s a bit on the pushy side with first timers.”

  “Herbie—that’s right. Couldn’t remember his name. He came on to me too, the first time I was here.”

  “Can’t say I blame him for trying,” Edward remarked with a wry smile.

  “I like your accent, very Southern gentleman. Are you from Virginia?”

  “North Carolina. You won’t have heard of the town.”

  “Try me.”

  “Ellingsworth.”

  “You’re right, I haven’t heard of it.”

  They chuckled together and Edward relaxed under the warmth of Alex’s charismatic personality.

  “You like the Rockin’ Bar?” Alex asked.

  “Yeah. I read in a magazine this was one of the best dance bars in LA so I had to check it out.”

  “Ah, so you like to dance?”

  “Love it. How about you?”

  “Are you asking me to dance?”

  Edward jerked his head in the direction of the dance floor. “Never can resist Radiohead,” he said, grinning.

  “Let’s do it.” Alex grabbed Edward’s hand and together they eased their way through the crowd.

  Maybe this evening won’t be a dud after all. Edward took time to admire Alex’s tall frame from behind and get an eyeful of the round contours of his muscular butt. The awkward moment with Herbie was forgotten as he and Alex joined the gyrating throng on the floor. Alex placed his hands lightly on Edward’s hips and started to move expertly to the solid beat. Oh yeah… He followed Alex’s lead, matching the man’s sensuous moves. They shared a smile then Alex pulled him closer and leaned in to brush his lips lightly over Edward’s.

  Wow, twice in one night… More than I’ve had in so long I can’t remember. And this time I don’t mind it at all. Nice… Better than nice.

  He felt a definite stirring in his groin from Alex’s featherlight touch and the thought of protesting as he had with Herbie didn’t even cross his mind. Instead, he pushed forward a little, inviting more than just a touch, parting his lips slightly. He breathed out an involuntary gasp when Alex slid the tip of his tongue over his lower lip. The thrill of it sent a jolt of desire straight to Edward’s cock. Wanting to prolong the sensation of Alex’s mouth on his, he reached up to cup the nape of Alex’s neck, holding him in place as their tongues tangled and the kiss morphed from one of mere fleeting pleasure to mind melting ecstasy.

  He was only vaguely aware that the music had slowed, and with it the movement of Alex’s body, now firmly pressed against Edward’s. Alex wrapped his strong arms around him, and an unmistakable hardness glided over his own confined erection. He leaned back just a little when their kiss ended so he could gaze into Alex’s dark brown eyes. They met his own with an intensity so powerful it made him tremble with anticipation of what the rest of this evening might bring. He’d never done this before, never allowed such searing intimacy with a veritable stranger, yet it seemed so natural. So good… So right. He inhaled the intoxicating, spicy scent that lingered on the smooth skin of Alex’s neck and buried his face there.

  They were barely moving now, simply swaying sensuously to the music, then Alex asked, “Perhaps we could find somewhere quieter to talk?”

  “Sounds like a plan.” Although he hated to give up the pleasure of being in Alex’s arms, the prospect of spending more time with him, perhaps alone, had the greater edge. There was no doubt from the state of both their arousals that talking would lead to something even more satisfying. At least that’s what he hoped for… Maybe at last fulfilling his fantasy.

  “I’m going to have to visit the john,” he said when they returned to the bar. “That beer is going straight through me. Sorry.”

  Alex smiled. “I’ll be right here when you get back. Don’t get lost.”

  “I won’t.” He headed toward the restroom sign. There was no one at the urinals but muffled sounds and whispers from one of the stalls told him he wasn’t alone. He’d just unzipped when he heard the main door open behind him.

  “Quite a display you were putting on back there,” a hostile sounding voice echoed off the tiled walls. Edward glanced round to see Herbie leaning against the sink counter, glaring at him. “Your refined taste doesn’t exclude the likes of Alex Martinez, then?”

  “You know him?”

  “You sound surprised. Why shouldn’t I know him? You think he’s too hot for me to be acquainted with?”

  “No, I don’t think that at all.” Edward finished, tucked himself back in his jeans and zipped up. “I really don’t know why we’re having this conversation, though.” He strode over to one of the sinks, as far from Herbie as possible, and rinsed his hands under the hot water. “It’s none of your business who I dance with.”

  “Or who you practically have sex with on the dance floor. The hick, country boy from Bumfuck, North Carolina, becomes a slut when—”

  “Excuse me?” Edward cut Herbie off and took a step closer toward him. Edward might be new in town but he wasn’t going to be intimidated by anyone’s bullying tactics—gay or straight. Herbie backed up a tad but gave him a pugnacious stare. “Look…” Edward took a breath to calm down. “I’m sorry if I overreacted on the dance floor, but I didn’t know you from Adam—and I didn’t think it was okay for you to grope my ass and stick your tongue down my throat two seconds after we met.”

  “Is that right? I didn’t see you complaining when fuckin’ Alex Martinez was doing the same thing.” Herbie crossed his arms and once again it appeared as if some of the tattooed monsters on his skin had come to life.

  Bizarre…

  Edward controlled his revulsion and the impulse to punch the derision right off Herbie’s face. “Like I said, I don’t know why we’re talking about this. It’s none of your damn business, but if you don’t shut up, right now, I will forget my country boy good manners and slap that stupid sneer from your face.” He turned to leave, then asked, “How the hell d’you know I’m from North Carolina?”

  “Apart from the hick accent you mean? Gary, the bartender, told me. He thought you were so sweet. Man, did he get a shock when he saw you grinding against Martinez like a bitch in heat.”

  Edward laughed. “And you’re calling me a hick? Get a life, Herbie. This is a gay bar, where the sight of two guys kissing on the dance floor doesn’t exactly shake up the bartender.”

  “Yeah, well you’re getting in over your head. Martinez is some kind of big—” Herbie quickly shut up when the restroom door opened and Alex stood framed in
the doorway.

  “Is everything all right?” he asked Edward. “You’ve been gone a long time.”

  “Everything’s fine.” Edward chuckled. “Herbie here was trying to interest me in getting tattoos like his. But I have to say, if I never see them again, that’ll suit me just fine.” “Shall we go then?” Alex opened the door a little more. “I have a place in mind where we can actually hear one another.”

  “Sounds good. ’Night, Herbie.”

  “Fuckers,” Herbie muttered and stomped off ahead of them.

  Alex put an arm round Edward’s shoulders. “What happened?”

  “Oh, he’s pissed that I objected to him trying to put the make on me earlier. He’ll get over it.”

  “Yes, he will.” There was a determined set to Alex’s mouth and Edward sensed he should head off any kind of impending confrontation between the two men.

  “Uh, let’s not add any more unpleasantness, and just go.”

  “If you’re sure you’re all right.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Alex closed the restroom door and pushed Edward against it. “You certainly are,” he murmured before taking Edward’s lips in another long kiss. The tension fell from Edward’s body and he slid his arms up and around Alex’s neck, holding him, savoring his taste. The kiss became hotter and Edward was on the brink of lifting Alex’s T-shirt to get at his skin when a strangled groan came from the occupied stall. He’d forgotten they weren’t quite alone.

  “Not here,” Alex whispered, his lips still on Edward’s.

  Edward chuckled and rested his forehead on Alex’s. “Definitely not here.”

  * * * *

  After they had said goodnight to Gary, and Edward had received a thumbs-up from the bartender, they stepped outside into the chill night air.

  “I should’ve brought a jacket,” Edward mumbled and pressed himself into Alex’s side.

  “My car’s right there,” Alex said, putting an arm round Edward’s waist and hurrying him forward. “Where are you parked?”

  “I took a cab. Where are we going?”

  “My place.”

  “Oh…”

  “Too pushy?” The lights on his car, a white BMW, blinked and Alex opened the passenger door. “I promise nothing will happen that you don’t want to. But it is quieter, and I’d like to spend some time with you alone.”

  “Uh, okay, but can you drop me off at my place, after?”

  “Of course.”

  Edward got in the car, trying to ignore the flutter of nerves in his stomach. Alex seemed very nice, protective even, and sexy as hell. But appearances could be deceptive. He knew that only too well from experience, and what little experience he had wasn’t anything he really wanted to remember. Well, if things went wrong he could always leave. He might have to get a cab home, but he could handle that.

  “I have to tell you I haven’t done this before,” he said as Alex put the car in gear and they pulled out onto the road. “I mean, go back to a guy’s place after just meeting him. Of course, the chances of that happening when I lived at home were pretty remote. The couple of times I went into Charlotte I was too nervous to really enjoy myself. There was always the chance that I’d run into someone I knew.”

  “But wouldn’t running into someone you knew be a good thing?” Alex asked.

  “In what way?”

  “Well, you’d know you weren’t alone. You could make friends.”

  “Friends. Yeah that would’ve been nice. I had some friends once.”

  “What happened?”

  “Life, I guess.”

  Alex gave him a sidelong glance. “You are far too young to be so cynical, Edward.”

  “Your accent,” Edward said suddenly. “It’s faint, but I hear it now and then. Are you Spanish?”

  “Puerto Rican. The Alex is short for Alejandro. Alex makes it easier for people to remember.”

  “I would definitely remember Alejandro. It’s a beautiful name. Better than Edward, don’t you think? And I really hate it when people shorten it to Ed or Eddie.”

  Alex chuckled quietly. “Edward is a perfectly good name—and all that interest in my accent was a none too subtle way of changing the subject.”

  “Sorry, but I really don’t like talking about what I once had. I’m here, in LA now, and I want to look forward, not backward.”

  Alex nodded. “Perhaps when we know each other better, you’ll find it easier to tell me about it.”

  “Shit, I’m sorry.” Edward put his hand on Alex’s thigh and rubbed it gently. “Was I being rude? I didn’t intend to be.”

  Alex covered Edward’s hand with his own. “No, you weren’t rude—just guarded. And that’s understandable. You’ve only known me for a couple of hours.”

  Edward sighed. “That’s right, and I have to admit I am nervous about going home with you—yet at the same time it feels kind of good, being with you. Better than I’ve felt in a long time.”

  “I’m glad.” He squeezed Edward’s hand. “Listen, if you’d rather not come back to my place tonight, I’ll understand. We can make arrangements to meet another night. Tomorrow I’m free, then I’m flying to New York on business. I’ll be gone for about four days.”

  Edward stared at Alex and couldn’t quite control the sinking feeling in his stomach. Why, when I’ve just met the guy? Even though he’d be the first to say that yes, he was nervous about going back with Alex to his place—despite that, he was looking forward to what their time alone might bring. He didn’t really want to wait until tomorrow night.

  “No, it’s okay.” He was surprised his voice sounded steady and sure. “I’d like to go home with you tonight, if you don’t mind. I mean if…if you’re still in the mood. Uh…”

  Alex chuckled and squeezed Edward’s hand again. “I’m in the mood to get to know you better. Here we are.” He pulled into a driveway, at the end of which stood a modest-looking, white stucco house. They got out of the car and walked the few steps to the front door, which Alex unlocked then stepped aside so that Edward could enter.

  Chapter Two

  The interior was larger than he would have guessed from the outside. Wooden floors stretched the length of the living room, and through the French doors at the far end, Edward could see the soft blue reflection of light on water. A swimming pool. Not something he’d be tempted to try out on this chilly night, unfortunately. An arched fireplace surrounded by an intricate pattern of river stones took up the majority of one wall while the others held some large framed pieces of modern art.

  “Make yourself comfortable.” Alex pointed at the overstuffed leather couch in front of the fireplace. “Would you like a beer, or something else to drink?”

  “Beer’s fine, thanks.” Edward felt a little in awe of Alex’s home. Everything appeared to be expensive, and so very different from the house he’d been raised in, and the now meager apartment he shared with two roommates. While his host went into the kitchen to fetch his beer, he did a slow turn around, taking it all in before sinking down onto the couch’s plump cushions. He thought about what Alex must do for a living that afforded him such a beautiful place, and took him to New York for meetings. Something high powered, no doubt, and very different from being a bank teller. It was obvious their lives were poles apart, and he wondered why on earth Alex had chosen him to befriend when he could so easily have just about anyone he fancied.

  He should be flattered, but what he felt was unease and the sad realization that this could only be for one night, if it even went that far. But he did say he is free tomorrow night and they could meet. He looked up as Alex came back into the living room, a glass of beer in one hand, and wine in the other.

  “You seem to be deep in thought,” he remarked, sitting down beside Edward and handing him his beer.

  “Just admiring this room. It’s very nice.”

  “This house belonged to my aunt.” He took a sip of his wine before continuing. “She left it to me when she passed two years ago. It’s an old C
alifornia home—they don’t build them like this anymore.”

  “So your family’s lived in California a long time?”

  “Maria, my aunt, married a guy with a construction business here in LA. Their marriage didn’t last, but she liked California so she stayed. I would come here on vacation, then when my mother died I moved in with my aunt.”

  “I’m sorry—about your mother I mean.”

  “Thank you. It was many years ago. I was just a kid, ten years old, though I do have some nice memories of her.” He took Edward’s hand. “And you… You have a family back in North Carolina?”

  “Yes, but I’m afraid there are no nice memories. Some okay memories. My mom and I got along fine until…” He sighed. “Well, I said I didn’t want to talk about it.”

  “It might help if you share. Get it off your chest. I can tell you are harboring some bitter regrets.”

  He lifted Edward’s hand to his lips and kissed it gently. Edward gazed into the man’s dark eyes and for the first time in so long, he couldn’t remember precisely when it was, he experienced a surge of happiness, mixed with lust. But what exactly was wrong with having both those feelings at the same time? A happy lust. It felt good. Just being here with Alex felt good. So different from the previous times he’d been with a guy, even a guy he’d wanted to be with…

  But don’t get too caught up in it. Mustn’t put too much emphasis beyond the fact that Alex seems like a really nice guy. More than merely handsome, and sitting so close, holding my hand and making me forget the misgivings I had earlier about being alone with him here in his home.

  “There you go again,” Alex said, his deep voice a balm to Edward’s ears. “So lost in thought. So many emotions churning inside you. Relax, Edward. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to—or do anything you don’t absolutely want to.”

  Forcing his nervousness away, Edward whispered, “What I’d really like is to kiss you again.”

  Alex took Edward’s glass and placed it along with his wine glass on the low table in front of the couch. “I think I’d like that too,” he murmured before taking Edward into his arms. “You have a very kissable mouth.”